so we just came back from a trip to botswana with our good friends dreadlock mike (i call him that because his name is mike and he has, well, you know…) and nancy the twin (name is nancy and…) and friends and both of these incidents happened on either side of the botswanan trip, but they are related and quite funny so i thort i’d share…

the beautiful val and i fly up to the kwazulu of natal to connect with d mike and nancy tt and the plan is to drive to joburg, sleep over and then drive up to botswana together, meeting their friends on the way…

so as we are leaving kzn we stop at a pharmacy so tbv can buy some adrenalin to protect her from the deathly effects of being stung by bees and her and d mike are in the pharmacy while nancy and i head off to the atms to draw money (why do they call it drawing money cos clearly no drawing takes place?) and when we join up again, tbv has a story

the one old bat (no, really) behind the counter is looking at d mike and turns to val, who is waiting to pay, and says something about ‘wo, look at that hair of mankiness’ and so val responds, ‘that’s my friend’ and so the lady (in possibly a top ten of the all-time finest back-pedals) reresponds with, “oh i’m sure he must be a nice guy, but imagine making love to that hair” – this is like a 60yr plus lady – VERY funny…

then botswana happens and on the last nite as we feast on the most amazing (and cheap, from a place called all days on the way up to the bots) fillet, dreadlock mike manages to snap off and swallow one of his teeth (one of the two false teeth he has either side of his two main top row teeth) and so with dreadlocks and now missing tooth, when he does the mike redneck shoulder-raising laugh it is truly a sight to behold

we arrive back in durban on the fri nite and sat morning we head to the spca for a good breakfast (yes, yes, that sentence could be a blog in itself but this particular spca in kloof is like spca city so there is a restaurant and craft market and kareoke lady and a bunch of other stuff happening and they have a cheap slow tea garden vibe so we stopped for breakfast before the flight out)

d mike goes to the counter to order and the lady behind the counter looks at him and says, “how many girlfriends do you have?” [much funnier story when d mike tells it in accent] and he responds by showing her his wedding ring and says, “no, no, i’m married so there is just the one lady in my life” and she looks at him again and says, “no, i am pretty sure i saw you on Cheaters” and so d mike returns to our table with a very emphatic, “i need to get that tooth fixed!”

on a sad note, my hair was not quite long enuff for the dreadlocking of it by mike, so waiting will have to occur…