Too Sensitive?

Is it possible to be too sensitive? For most of my growing up years, I was told that I was. It was usually after a fight with my mom, or after telling her about something a teacher or a friend said at school that mom was quick to say “are you sure you aren’t being too sensitive?” I hated it then just as much as I hate it now. It caused me a lot of pain when I was younger. Not only did I get hurt easily by my mom, friends, teachers, etc. I also thought that there was something innately wrong with how sensitive I was. I would often wish I could be more like others who were so confident and not so easily wounded. On top of that, I have dyslexia and an eye disorder that caused me to wear a patch in school. You can imagine how much fun kids had making fun of my poor reading skills and pirate costume every day!

Well, one of the things that I love about Jesus is his love for children. Remember how he said that a child would lead us?….having a daughter much like me has taught me to start seeing my sensitivity as a blessing.

My almost 13 year old daughter is wired much the same way as I am, with a very sensitive spirit. She is also dyslexic and has been getting teased a lot these past two years by peers. Recently, I caught myself telling her that she was too sensitive! I seriously felt pain in the pit of my belly as I heard those words come out of my mouth. I had to ask for forgiveness for doing to her what I had done to me. There are some things taking place in her life that are far too painful for a 13 year old to experience, and I realized that she needed to know that the way she is wired (her sensitivity), is exactly how God intended her to be. This is what I have been in the process of learning myself, as a 37 year old, so imagine if she can start believing this at such a young age! Imagine the pain that she could avoid and the strength she could carry to offer the world if she truly believed that her sensitivity is actually a gift!

I explained to my daughter how much pain our sensitivity can cause us if we aren’t anchored into the truth of God. If we base how we feel about ourselves on how others think about us, we will be tossed about in the turbulent waves of the ocean. I reminded her of when we are out fishing, we sometimes purposely don’t drop the anchor so we can drift until we start catching fish but if we aren’t careful to keep watch we may drift too far into a crab pot, another boat, or too shallow of water. But once we find fish and we drop the anchor, we will not drift away. We will stay anchored to the place we know that provides plenty of fish….. As it is with our anchoring to the Holy Spirit. When we know who we are in Christ and Christ in us, our sensitivity becomes to the things that are life giving, things that bring hope, light, love, joy, peace….

I shared with my daughter how I have found my sensitivity to be a gift. As a mom, I can see when my children hurt, as a friend I notice when there is need for a long talk and listen, as a nurse in one of the poorest neighborhoods of Philadelphia, I am able to show love and compassion to women whose stories break my heart! But more than anything, my sensitivity is a God given gift to make me sensitive to God. I feel when I have distanced myself from God. I feel it when I have done something wrong that needs forgiveness. I cannot go on with life as usual if something is between me and God or between me and my family and friends. Isn’t the greatest commandment to love God and love neighbor? My sensitivity keeps me in check!

I have come to accept that I am “too” sensitive at times. I do get hurt easily, but I am much more aware of not hurting others and when I do, I am quick to make things right. My prayer is that the more that myself and Alexa are anchored into the Divine one, the more we will sense God’s love for us…the more we will love others…the more we will love each other. I am so thankful God gave me a child so much like myself. In many ways it has helped me to self-reflect and see the gift of what I once saw as a weakness. It may have taken me decades to figure out how to anchor this sensitivity thing, not that I have fully figured it out. I have learned that the scars created by my weaknesses are becoming beauty marks! By the grace of God, I know that I was made to be this way and it is a gift, not a curse!

[Lara M. Lahr RN. – head on over to Lara’s blog to read more of her wisdom and stories…]

to read the WOO factor Strength Weakness of my mate Rob Murray go here