Either/Or vs Both/And

What if we replaced the Either/Or way of thinking with something that looked a little more like Both/And?

This is a thought that keeps coming back to me as i seek to use online spaces to inspire, challenge, encourage and build bridges between people who don’t look like each other.

When i speak about justice for black, coloured and indian people i get accused of hating white people.

If i speak about the problems of the legacy of apartheid for so many people today, i get directed towards the corruption of the present government.

The moment someone says anything negative about Trump, the “What about Hilary?” choir starts warming up their voices.

And so on.

But what if i told you that i can love white people [i am one, after all, and i happen to think we can be great] and also at the same time fight for justice for black, coloured and indian people?

Did your mind just literally, metaphorically or figuratively explode? i hope not, because that seems like such an easy concept to get.

What if it is possible to hold the fact that the corruption we have experienced in all levels of government in the years since 1994 is a terrible terrible thing, as is the corruption that was experienced [along with the evil system of government that was being created and implemented and safeguarded, so if we had to pick sides] pre-1994 that i’m sure we don’t even have the full picture about? Can we hold those two things in tension and come to the conclusion that these are both bad things?

Because i have seen white people continuously holding up the present corruption as if it is a pass for everything that went before in terms of apartheid and colonialism and the dehumanisation of people. No, no, NO, there is no way that any actions by this present government and those that will follow in any way makes anything that happened before okay or alright in any way.

But i have also seen black people who hold up the past corruption of the apartheid government as if it is a pass for everything that has happened since. To that i would also say no, no, NO, that is not okay. For many reasons, but possibly the main one being that present corruption has happened at the expense of the poor, who are still for the most part largely black, coloured and indian.

It’s not an Either/Or, it is a Both/And!

i find that too often the Either/Or mentality is used to draw battle lines between people that divide.

Whereas embracing a Both/And way of looking at things tends to bring people together to work at figuring out how to move forward together, given the present way of thinking.

This is not to say that every situation is a Both/And. i do still believe there are some times where the answer is more direct and explicit. But my suggestion is that we try to each become more aware – especially when we feel really strongly about a thing – of the possibility that there is a Both/And where we are proclaiming Either/Or.

Whataboutism

It is worth introducing and defining a term some of you may not have heard before which is Whataboutism…

Whataboutism, also known as whataboutery, is a variant of the tu quoque logical fallacy that attempts to discredit an opponent’s position by charging them with hypocrisy without directly refuting or disproving their argument. [Wikipedia]

An example of this would be if i was campaigning about how awful a topping pineapple is for pizza [my opinion. not a fact!] Someone hears me and responds with, “What about anchovies? Those are an awful topping for pizza.”

They have just demonstrated Whataboutery. Their argument – whether true or not – has not done anything to refute my original statement, yet they have delivered it in such a way as if it did.

This is the idea that two wrongs don’t make a right. First person mentions a thing that is wrong [eg murder]. Second person responds with, “But what about rape?” as if to suggest that the statement about murder was incorrect.

This is Both/And territory. How awful would it be if we had to choose which of murder or rape was wrong? [Either/Or] What if we open ourselves to the possibility that both murder AND rape can be wrong. For those who are focused on murder and maybe know someone who has been murdered and working towards justice for murder victims, there is nothing lost in acknowledging and declaring that rape is wrong as well. And vice versa.

Whataboutery is not helpful. It seeks to distract from a valid point being made through misdirection. And when the whataboutery example is a val example, then it might cause confusion, especially because we live in a society that tends to want us to choose an Either/Or rather than see the possibility of a Both/And.

For a lot of you who tend to follow my stuff, this might not be new. But hopefully for some of you it is. Maybe it is worth thinking about the issues you have been fighting for this past week and seeing if there were any moments when you went for an Either/Or which might have been improved upon by recognising the Both/And…

Now if you really want to have your mind blown, what if it is BOTH a rabbit AND a duck?

[For a post looking at the difference between Critique and Criticism, click here]

[For a post exploring Racial Inclusion over Racial Isolation, click here]