Listen to me…

i had a catchup lunch with my good friend Linda Martindale yesterday. 

i texted her this morning to let her know it had been good for my soul.

It was great catching up and it was really cool to show her bits of the book that i’m writing and get some input and be able to send some to her for perusal; it was amazing to meet her niece Rebecca Stead in person [Twitterer and Facebook friends] and to eat the amazing lunch she bought me; and it was really good to hear what she’s been up to and some of the stuff she is currently wrestling with and to talk about shtupidt people in South Africa [looking at you white lady writing book on coloured culture because your coloured friends told you some stuff!] and more.

But mostly it was super good to be listened to. And Linda does that well.

Life and God and dead friends and new friends and race stuff and work and social media and #NotOnOurWatch’ing and money and more.

i met Linda when i was on a music and drama team [i know!] in 1994 and so my friendship with her is probably one of my longest friendships with anyone. She is one of those people who i don’t spend a whole lot of time with but every time i do it is absolute quality and she is just such a legend that those words will make her embarrassed. But it’s true, so blush it out!

But the main reminder i want to give with this post is the importance of listening. Really listening.

i am trying to be a better listener to people. To hold back on the next thing i want to say and make sure they are finished. Try and really engage with what someone is saying to me instead of trying to plan my response internally. To not interrupt [which for me is a big one and it basically says what i have to say feels more important than what you are busy saying – it is awful!]

But Linda did all of that well. And i turned to my wife in bed last night and mentioned to her that time with Linda had been good for my soul. Which i messaged her this morning. Cos it is good to let people know things like that.

So as a lunch catchup with a friend, it really couldn’t have been better.

Although after Linda left i did order myself one of these beauties:

And as disgusting as you might think beer-soaked bacon-covered deep-fried Oreos might sound, you would be WRONG! They were incredible. Argus cycle tour training began today… #PastisBrasserieConstantia

Who could use your ear this weekend?