World, i need help.

i’ve tried to be strong about this and persevere and last them out, but i think they are starting to win.

i’m talking about ants, the ones currently taking over my life.

Jaden Smith insane facts

Three days ago, Jaden Smith [son of Will ‘Fresh Prince’ Smith] took over the internet with a viral video in which he shares some mind-blowing [to him] facts with Vanity Fair that had shaken up his whole life, including this one:

“For every human on Earth, there are roughly 1.6 million ants… My whole life has been a lie,” he tells in amazement.

i don’t know how true that is, because i’m pretty sure i’ve counted about 6 million at our place alone, which might mean that some of you may need to swing round and grab some of your ants.

My wife, aka the beautiful Val [tbV], tells me that Diep River is actually meant to be built on some kind of ant kingdom or that there are huge ant kingdoms underground or something like that. i think we both secretly fear that any day now, one tunnel is going to be joined to another tunnel too many and our entire house is going to just sink into the ground and be swallowed up by ants [if that happens, i hope they have the decency to spell out the words “He Told You So” with their tiny little ant bodies…

The other night i had some nuts in a bowl next to my bed which i ate. i then took the bowl to the kitchen and put it down on the counter and looked at it and it was completely full of ants. Somehow, between me finishing the snacks [that’s the story i’m sticking with – they weren’t particularly spicy so i think i’m good] and taking the bowl to the kitchen [which was a short short short period of time that could be measured in big piles of seconds] a whole infestation took place.

They make little ant versions of mole holes in our back little courtyard and it has now become a weekly ritual to place our kitchen dustbin outside sometime during the week because of a stream of ants that will no doubt find their way to something in it.

SAVE THE ANIMALS, BUT IT’S TIME TO DRAW A LINE

i came back from Americaland, much more determined not to end life any time i had a chance to save it. In the past i used to kill spiders that came across my pathg just because. Now, i will do everything i can to protect them or shepherd them and let them go – on the other wise we don’t want our house to become a complete haunted-house style web-fest so we may have to figure that one out.

Even cockroaches i tend to grab and eject from my house over killing them. My neighbours may not be as big of a fan of that one.

And mosquitoes… well let’s just say i have NEVER met anyone who has made me feel guilty about killing mosquitos… and i kinda feel like ants and cockroaches probably fall into that category [although surely there’s a hypocrisy in there?]

So back to the ants… IT… IS… TIME… they are starting to affect my mental state and i am so tired of finding them appearing on counters in no time at all for the smallest of crumbs that they find.

ants

i appeal to you, internet for solutions – someone has mentioned ant traps which to be honest i just have not gotten round to but am keen to try cos apparently they fix the problem on a bigger level…

But any other ideas for keeping them outside or dead or something?