So, after i finish this post i am heading out to a potential work thing.

There is another possibility a friend mentioned the other day – doing something i would really enjoy and love to do in an area i have wanted to spend a lot more time in. But i don’t know whether it is actually going to be a job and if so when it will be available for me.

Besides that, i have a bunch of open tabs on my computer linking to sites that deal with transcription and freelance article writing and teaching English via Skype through conversation; as well as some emails that come in daily with surveys and other potential job opportunities.

Worst CV ever

i’m not going to lie. It’s not a super fun space to be in and yet i can’t complain too loudly, because there are literally millions who have it worse off than me. The question is about whether or not it is possible to find some work that i would enjoy doing, that would feed me life, instead of sucking it away [again, a huge privilege most don’t have!]

i am definitely a lot more skilled than my CV/Résumé would suggest, although it doesn’t look TOO bad. It would tell you that

# It would tell you that i am qualified to be a primary school teacher [something i honestly don’t think i am good at even a little bit, and mostly because of discipline issues, which i am pretty awful at when it comes to young children]

# It would mention that i have written for at least three magazines [one online, which i am currently doing although from next month i just had the amount of work i do for that magazine halved, as did everyone else].

# It might mention that i have written and published a book about the church, and that i have written regularly for Scripture Union devotional books for children and teens, namely Khula and Closer to God.

# It should probably mention that i have run Improv workshops with adults and children in a variety of settings and that with my friend Megan we have put together an incredible Improv/Story-telling workshop that would help staff in a company to get to the point where they feel safe and free to start sharing their stories about race and privilege. This has never been used, but i am convinced that it would be incredible given the chance.

# It might find some way to mention that i have a lot of experience as a public speaker, having spoken in front of small groups, meetings with 100 people and gatherings of 1000 people before and i feel super comfortable no matter how big the audience is, if the topic of conversation is something that is known to me. i have MC’d a number of weddings and other gatherings and that is something else that comes quite naturally to me.

# It probably would not mention the short time i spent as a cashier in a local supermarket [woergh!] or the five years i spent as a super casual in the Rondebosch Spur restaurant [best job in the world when everything goes well, which it never did, but waitering, which in essence is serving people, is a fun job i enjoyed] or the eight weeks in an old people’s day clinic in the United Kingdom [olds!] or eight weeks as a membership assistant in a Professors and Teachers Union office over there.

# It may mention the 18 months spent as hospitality co-ordinator at the Simple Way in Philly or the 18 months as whatever it was i did for Common Change in Oakland, California [social media, story-telling, admin guy] and probably would mention the various years of work spent as youth or student leader in different churches in Claremont, Kenilworth, Stellenbosch and Oakland.

Hm, okay, so maybe not the worst CV ever once you start listing stuff and things.

Here is the thing

One of the reasons i have been doing things the way i have been doing them [freelance writing and working largely from home] over the last three years, is based on a value or decision that Val and i have had and tried to work around which realises that a lot of the non-official-work-related stuff i do is valuable from online engagements to blog-writing to one-on-one conversation to being able to volunteer with the PJW [Peace Justice Witnesses] with their More Than Peace work, specifically during #FeesMustFall vibes, and hosting Deep Dive Conversation Dinners and working on a book on race for white people [which i haven’t touched for months, sad face] and now busy with a one year study program through the University of Pretoria called LUT [Leadership in Urban Transformation]… we value those things and so we have valued making space for them and trying to make our lives and our money stretch around them.

Me being at home sitting on a computer has not been an accidental thing.

But with the magazine work being cut in half and with Val working part time for part of the time, it has meant that we have had to look elsewhere. Which is what we are doing now.

It has not been easy and it has not been super fun and i don’t know if any of the dim lights at the end of tunnels are going to turn into daylight or an approaching train right now, so it remains a bit of an uneasy time… but even this time has helped me to in the smallest of ways appreciate those who don’t have work at all and possibly much less prospects than i have of finding it. For that i am grateful.

But i think both of us would stand by the decisions we have made because we have tried to shift our values away from money-making and upgrading to living more simply [still work to be done] and rather focusing on the what of time spent than the how much.

And i need to get going for that possible thing i have to check which kind of light it might be…