The other day i wrote a poem titled ‘to them who have ears’ and just thinking about it a little more today, have dubbed it a choir poem – as in those who get what it’s about and who agree will totally be reading and nodding and cheering and liking and sharing… but those who don’t, are unlikely to even read it and if they somehow do, unlikely to understand the point trying to be made…
So i thought i would try this again in a more direct approach, realising that for the most part blog posts tend to go the way of metaphorical word pieces in that you tend to attract those who agree and distance those who disagree… which feels somewhat pointless in terms of how are you ever going to affect people who need to be affected and where will you find healthy debate from people who think differently from you who can help you challenge and test your own ideas… i guess there is the hope that there are some who think differently who are trying to challenge and check their own ideas as much as i am trying to with mine and so maybe we can meet somewhere in the middle…
The main point of the poem for me was to question why so many white people [and it has been largely white people because of the nature of the posts i have been sharing on race and reconciliation and privilege so has largely been addressed to us] disengage from the conversations around race/white privilege/restitution etc before seeming to really take a moment to listen and hear where the other person is coming from. My problem is not so much that there is disagreement, but that phrases like ‘white privilege’ seem to be like red cloths waved in front of a raging bull… and so excuses, denials, “But what about…”, “Reverse Racism”, “Not all white people…” and more are immediately thrown in, usually breaking up the conversation before it begins.
RESPONSE OVER REACTION
When it comes to conversations on race and other issues in South Africa, i would love to see people choosing to respond over simply reacting. The idea of a reaction is that it is usually a gut knee-jerk response [with the emphasis not on knee] whereas a response tends to include time for listening, thought, inner wrestling and composed feedback. This is something we could do a lot better as South Africans, or maybe just Facebookers and Bloggerists in general.
Take something like ‘White Privilege’ for example – i wrote some thoughts about this in a post titled ‘i’m not sure you’re against that thing you’re against’ simply because i believe the word has certain baggage which triggers a reaction, whereas if those who typically respond to seeing the words ‘white privilege’ by running/throwing/emoting could just take a deep breathe and listen and really hear what is being said/suggested, i think a lot more of them would agree. Take this picture for example:
i imagine most people would agree with this, right? If you see this and disagree then i would love to know why. Unless of course you would label the whole thing as Injustice simply by the very fact of it depicting three people who are watching a game for free without buying tickets, but that is kinda missing the point.
The point of the picture is that the tall guy starts off with an advantage whereas the short guy starts off at a disadvantage. Which means that if they are all treated equally, the short guys still ends up disadvantaged.
Whereas if the one who was most disadvantaged, is given the biggest assistance, there is a way for them to all end up with a level playing field, enjoying the same advantage.
Anyone have a problem with that? Because as far as i understand it, that IS the explanation of White Privilege.
There are certain advantages we start off with in this world [For me being white has some, being male in a largely patriarchally influenced society has others, being heterosexual and right-handed and able-bodied even more so] which doesn’t mean that i have to feel guilty for any of those things i start off with, but it does mean, that for the world to be more fair and balanced and equal, that certain boxes, boosts, advantages will be needed to be given to people of colour, women etc to give them the same opportunities that i have.
You with me? This feels so easy when it is broken down like this.
So i am not talking about white guilt or about hating white people [i get that one a lot!]. i am talking about the need to listen to and really hear from anyone who does not start off with the advantages i have started off with, to find out how best we can together work so that the field is more level for them. Collaboration is key. There may be some sacrifice involved and some loss of comfort or actively working against some of the privilege i have [so BEE being an example of this, realising that at times it really hasn’t been done well and at times it really has been helpful]
How about it South Africa? You ready to slow things down a little and really start listening and engaging and working together on making this relationally the beautiful country it is naturally?
Let’s do this…
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Brett my friend. Question…who gets to decide what the “level field” looks like? Everyone coming together with their advantages and disadvantages to do what? What is the “baseball game” everyone should be entitled to see?
Great question, Rob. I don’t know the overall general answer to that, but like in the picture, with the really tall guy and the really small guy it’s pretty obvious what needs to happen. The middle guy there may need to be some negotiating around. One of the biggest problems here at the moment seems not to be answering those questions, which come a little later, as much as getting people to admit there is any starting disadvantage in the first place. Relationship between tall guy and short guy has to be key in this, cos once you are friends with the disadvantaged person, it no longer becomes a problem to be solved as much as a person to be helped. Once that is realised, then hopefully together you can figure out a game that seems appropriate and attainable to all in some way.
I don’t think its obvious what needs to happen to be honest (as if I’m not normally honest and need to state when I am actually being honest 🙂
People need opportunities to be brought into purpose, a story or vision with a challenging but clear path to actualize that vision. If leaders who have a clear grasp on the landscape can find practical, creative, tangible ways for ordinary aware and unaware people to be swept up into the solution, knowing or unknowingly then we may see some great things.
Like chess. See the end game or 5 moves ahead while you make the next move. You know that if I go to camp I’m going to make new friends. You know if I am put in a situation to know that disadvantaged individual then I’ll be more likely to understand their value and the privileges I have been given as a relationship develops. But it has to start with an invite into a part of the solution in ways I can comprehend. We all have our hearts and minds immersed in various facets and challenges in the world or we’re fixated on ourselves.
Defining and engaging on the topic of “Privilege” is one your big themes but it’s not mine so I’m going to need more than a constant defining on what privilege is to motivate me. It’s not because I’m against it, it’s just that my capacity and passion may rest in other themes that beat closest to my heart. How can we help create front door opportunities for others to knowingly or unknowingly, be involved in some big or small way that propels them into the solutions we see for the problems we’re called to address. Does this make sense? I don’t know enough nor will probably read enough about the topic of privilege so I need the experts to consider what would motivate people like me and others to get involved because ultimately it would be a great thing to be a part of it.
It’s 7am in the morning with only half a cup of coffee down who knows what I’m saying.
If one man steals 90 cows from another man. Leave him with 10. Then while 90 cow guy is advantaged. Going forward it must be solved. No more negotiation, I propose a repay tax of 50 percent of salary from whites to blacks. Equality and justice. Or leave and go to Holland.
Hm, well my home is South Africa so there is nothing Holland has to offer me besides chocolate on bread. Yum. i think the problem is a whole lot more complicated than your 100 cow scenario. Especially when you are talking a generation or two later and it’s more about trying to find overall balance than specific case judgement for the wrongs that were committed but rather trying to right the systemic wrongs that are now contributing to the disparity.
Poor example. Blacks are equal to whites with intelligence. Why you say not?you racist to subtly promote white privilege by saying you against it. It’s inequality due to theft. Not tallest or cleverest.
Just looking at the picture, I thought “That looks like grace, not justice.” I like Rob’s questions.
And I had a similar idea for general admission concerts.
Yes. Whites must pay now. But I’m tired of you say we not advantaged. Are you saying we dumb? When a white says there exists white privilege then it means you think we blacks are not clever like you. Why you say this?
hi Thabang. Not sure what you mean by whites must pay now, that feels quite general. i am not suggesting anyone is dumb. By white privilege i am simply referring to the fact that currently if you are born white in South Africa the chances are that you start off with more advantages than if you are born black. Nothing to do with clever. All about the benefits the majority of whites still, well, benefit from in this country that i believe still needs some addressing.
More stolen items whites begin with. No more talk is how we feel. Give it back. No negotiations now. It’s time to return stolen goods. What percent do you donate Mr author?
i have yet to meet someone from any race group who has a practical suggestion as how to do reparation [when it comes to land, never mind money] but i have been asking that question for some time… my wife and i give to a number of different people and causes we believe in out of the generosity and abundance of funds we receive… it is going to take a while before my authoring brings any money in as there is still the hole of money that went out to pay for it, but trusting that in time we will cover that and then hopefully have some more money to invest in good things and people…
Don’t be shy with percent. Why you keep what’s not yours? To show other whites, give up this way of privilege.
Okay Thabang, so give me an idea how this works practically. I surely can’t give the money to you right? Because I never took money from you. So who do I give it to? To keep things just?
Oh that God would teach us to LISTEN, truly listen.