so if you're new here, brett andy comments are those that i make up having been hugely inspired by the far better jack handey quotes such as: "I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then when somebody comes up act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!"" [Jack Handey] and: "I [...]
so by now i assume you know the drill - working on jack handeyesque brett andy one liners and needing some feedback as to which ones work and which don't - after starting round 3 feeling like i was going backwards i managed to hit two really popular ones and so i may be getting my groove back on - which ones of these made you smile, laugh or feel the need to forward on? [...]
so one of my favourite funny people in life is a guy called Jack Handey who used to write one liners that were used on SNL such as: "Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the room, talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books." [Jack Handey] and: "Laurie got offended that I used the word "puke." But to me, that's what her [...]
so one of my favourite funny people in life is a guy called Jack Handey who used to write one liners that were used on SNL such as: 'I remember how, in college, I got that part-time job as a circus clown, and how the children would laugh and laugh at me. I vowed, then and there, that I would get revenge.' [Jack Handey] or: 'Any man, in the right situation, is capable of murder. [...]
at a time when my blog has been getting hectically serious and argumentative, i think it's time to toss in some humourousnessityalism: Firstly some David Robertson: "If you’re singing in a wedding, I don’t think it’s fair to make you stop just because the bride and groom don’t know who you are." "If I got to choose for one entire race to be completely wiped off the face of the earth, I would probably go [...]
so i read this article in the restaurant this morning while waiting for my buddy to arrive. firstly it was set in miami secondly the premise of it is completely hilarious slash disturbing as in this line: 'burglars snorted remains of a man and two dogs in the mistaken belief that they had stolen illegal drugs' thirdly, that's not the best part fourthly it goes on 'once they realised their error the suspects discussed returning [...]
so we made it home from the ambassador's youth orange trip yesterday... made it home? sounds like survival talk there? oh wait, it is... the trip for me included a near death experience - or one that felt like it anyway - for me and so i am really glad to be back, and with my the beautiful Val again... all in all it was an incredible trip - a lot of effort needed at [...]
so we made it home from the ambassador's youth orange trip yesterday... made it home? sounds like survival talk there? oh wait, it is... the trip for me included a near death experience - or one that felt like it anyway - for me and so i am really glad to be back, and with my the beautiful Val again... all in all it was an incredible trip - a lot of effort needed at [...]
I remember how, in college, I got that part-time job as a circus clown, and how the children would laugh and laugh at me. I vowed, then and there, that I would get revenge. Love can sweep you off your feet and carry you along in a way you've never known before. But the ride always ends, and you end up feeling lonely and bitter. Wait. It's not love I'm describing. I'm thinking of a [...]
Why do the caterpillar and the ant have to be enemies? One eats leaves, and the other eats caterpillars. Oh, I see now. I hope they never find out that lightning has a lot of vitamins in it, because do you hide from it or not? It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I guess that's what I like about it. It's easy. Just sitting there, rocking back [...]