in a nutshell if you refer to your woman (whether it be girlfriend or fiance or wife) as a 'ball and chain' or any similiar type negative reference you are probably in need of an attitude shift... or maybe a slap to the head (and i am more than happy to assist with either!) as tbVal pointed out to me today it is often the very people who should be campaigning for the opposite who [...]
i’m not a big fan of commercialised Christmas vibes and in particular Christmas carols – woergh – kinda hate them with a passion... my wife, TBV, is a big fan of Christmas and Christmas-related stuff though (although she says carols aren’t huge for her either!) and i realised the other day that in my adamant ‘we will fight carols on the beaches, we will fight them on the shores, we will never surrender’ and ‘i [...]
Hollywood (and the greater media) pretty much says (intimates) that love is a feeling and that the expression of that feeling is sex, and also pretty much once the feeling goes love has gone and you should walk away (and get a divorce). Which is why we have such a huge divorce rate where one out of three (or is it two now) marriages end in divorce. But there is another, better way... A way [...]
this part added by my wife, TBV: Step away from the emotion of the moment. I really struggle to think clearly, reason well, and see things from Brett’s point of view, when I am caught up in the emotion of the immediate argument. I may be hurting, angry, frustrated, sad, feeling sorry for myself, or incredibly teary. I often cannot think straight at all and this results in me “blanking out” – literally shutting out [...]
I don’t think tbV and i are there yet, in fact i know we’re not. It’s definitely a work in progress and there is definitely progress because we are working on it. We argue a lot better (in terms of nicer, friendlier, love-lier) than we used to when we were going out, but we can do even better. But there are definitely some principles we can share from what we do take care to do. [...]
ah bless (as they would say in the englandited kingdom) it seems the thing about not being able to read tone from an email (so don't ever have an argument via email - go live, really - meaning received quickly becomes not meaning sent) applies to blogs too yesterday's bermuda time triangle in marriage thort which i had intended as a light-hearted whimsical tongue-in-cheek adrian mole/adrian plass type "where's-the-time" montage was interpreted as a serious [...]
so i have been married for about 14 months yesterday and i still completely highly recommend it if it is to the right person - it is not always easy - it is sometimes really hard - but it is incredible and the pros definitely outbeat-up-and-leave-bleeding-behind-the-shed the cons... and i love the beautiful Val - really feel privileged and lucky and amazed that i have someone like her in my life... yay. the one thing [...]
i do have lots of thorts on this topic and so hopefully i will blog some of them down here as well sometime but the beautiful Val has written a really brilliant blog on 'the honeymoon phase' of marriage so if you are married (and even if you're not and are just taking notes, check this out!) beautiful lady blog on the honeymoon phase