#NotOnOurWatch

i speak a lot about #NotOnOurWatch and thought it deserved a post.

Interrupting Racism

As a white person, i hold to a daily #NotOnOurWatch commitment when it comes to racism. This is a commitment i make every morning when i get up to interrupt racism wherever i see it. There are a few things that come to mind:

• Every Day – not simply when i feel like it, which is not a lot of the time because it seldom goes well. Surprisingly people don’t always [ever] appreciate it when you call them out on behaviour, words or activities. But if you have made the commitment before you come across the racism,  i find that the will to do something about it is stronger.

• Online and offline – This happens in a Facebook status or a tweet, a joke sent to a family or sporting whatsapp group and it happens at the dinner table or in a parking lot. The commitment is to interrupt racism when it happens in front of me and at the very least let the person know, “That is not okay!” There are times when you will be able to go a lot deeper and do what feels like helpful work in terms of education or engagement, but at the very least it is about interrupting. Part of this is for black, coloured and indian people who are watching to know that you get that this stuff matters and that you are committed to fighting against it.

• Close to home – While this should happen everywhere, even with strangers,, in my opinion, the place where it is likely to have the greatest effect is with people i know who i have relationship with and some level of respect. These moments can feel harder because there is more to lose, but they are all the more essential because your voice carries more weight when it is people you know. Every time you let racism happen uninterrupted in front of you, you are silently giving assent to it and you immediately become part of the problem.

Let the idea of a #NotOnOurWatch commitment be a daily reminder to get more actively involved in bringing about Justice.

Interrupting Sexism and gender-based violence

As a man, i hold to a daily #NotOnOurWatch commitment when it comes to sexism. This is a commitment i make every morning when i get up to interrupt sexism wherever i see it. There are a few things that come to mind:

• Every Day – not simply when i feel like it, which is not a lot of the time because it seldom goes well. Surprisingly people don’t always [ever] appreciate it when you call them out on behaviour, words or activities. But if you have made the commitment before you come across sexism,  i find that the will to do something about it is stronger.

• Online and offline – This happens in a Facebook status or a tweet, a joke sent to a family or sporting whatsapp group and it happens at the dinner table or in a parking lot. The commitment is to interrupt sexism when it happens in front of me and at the very least let the person know, “That is not okay!” There are times when you will be able to go a lot deeper and do what feels like helpful work in terms of education or engagement, but at the very least it is about interrupting. Part of this is for women who are watching to know that you get that this stuff matters and that you are committed to fighting against it.

• Close to home – While this should happen everywhere, even with strangers,, in my opinion, the place where it is likely to have the greatest effect is with people i know who i have relationship with and some level of respect. These moments can feel harder because there is more to lose, but they are all the more essential because your voice carries more weight when it is people you know. Every time you let sexism happen uninterrupted in front of you, you are silently giving assent to it and you immediately become part of the problem.

#NotOnOurWatch is not a personal commitment

When i started using the hashtag it began as #NotOnMyWatch and people still often mistake it for that. But i changed it within a day of using it because i realised that one person holding to that commitment doesn’t mean a whole lot of difference. The reason i use #NotOnOurWatch is both as a reminder to myself personally every day as i look in the mirror that i am committed to Justice. Another reason is as a reminder that i cannot make much difference alone – i constantly have to be extending the invitation to others to join the #NotOnOurWatch revolution. 

There are some further aspects that come to mind here:

• Education is key: To be against racism i need to do the work of educating myself to understand how and where it plays out, what the history of it has been and who it affects in what ways. To be against sexism and the connected gender-based violence i need to be learning and listening and starting to see where it plays out so that i can be more effective. For any other type of injustice i want to interrupt there will be work required of me. There are so many resources available to do the work and so i really just have to commit to the time and some effort.

• Perseverance is important: Too often, those who are affected by injustice see people get inspired and jump in and make a lot of noise and dedicate themselves to the task, only for another thing to happen two weeks later and for them to drop everything and run to the next thing. This cannot be a flavour–of-the-month kind of thing. Black, coloured and indian people want to see white people making a lifelong commitment to change. Women want to see men who will dedicate themselves to fighting for their safety and protection and for change for the rest of their lives. This is the only way that systems and structures can ever be affected. And anything less is not good enough.

• Internal Reflection is vital: The quest to interrupt injustice has to begin in front of the mirror. i have to start [and continue] by recognising and acknowledging where i have been problematic [and may still be], inviting outside voices to speak to my blind spots, working on my defensiveness [none of us like to be told we are getting it wrong] and being mentored and held accountable by people who will not be afraid to speak the truth.

• Let it infiltrate your D.N.A.: The fight against injustice should be easily seen in your life. It should be observable in terms of how you spend your money. Noticeable in how you spend your time. Discernible in the way you use your resources and expend your energy and in looking at what you prioritise. The more you give pursuing Justice time and attention, the more naturally it will come to you. Hopefully then you will be able to draw more people into the journey with you.

• There is no end point: It is highly unlikely that racism will end in our lifetime [just read the comme….NO, NO, NO, NEVER READ THE COMMENTS!!!] or sexism or gender-based violence. We have to realise that these are battle we are going to be engaged in for the rest of our lives. This becomes a tricky one because a lot of people will speak about self-care and pacing yourself and while i see the merit in that, racism and sexism doesn’t take a break. It is the height of privilege to be able to choose when to engage and when not to engage with these things. So i would tend to say maybe slow down a little bit if things are feeling a bit too rough, but never fully step out unless you really really have to because you are going to have a breakdown – and even then remember the privilege you have as you do that.

Will you join me?

Many of you who are reading this will have already signed up for this commitment. But if this is your first time reading about it, there is no t-shirt or club meeting or anything visible to say you are doing this. It really is a personal commitment to a communal movement. What we call it is not as important as that we are committed to doing it. Giving it a name just sometimes help people to focus and remember and make that daily commitment again.

For those committing to work on their anti-racism, there are 40 tips here to get you going, and i have started putting my list of 50 ideas into video form over here.

For men committed to working on our anti-sexism, there are 40 tips here to get you going.

Beyond those there is this piece on Listening which might be helpful for all forms of Justice work.

Last thing i want to say on #NotOnOurWatch is the Invitational nature of this. Hopefully, these and other resources are things you can use to get your family and friends and even children talking about these things. Create spaces where people feel free to engage in conversations that matter and help get them started by using articles or songs or videos to get them thinking and then talking.