listening

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Dominate this week in 3 easy steps.

May this be a week where we seek to listen more, be slower in reply and hungry for increased knowledge over being right. LISTEN MORE BE SLOW TO REPLY INCREASED KNOWLEDGE OVER BEING RIGHT Let's see what this week might look like as we put those three into practice... Have a great one love brett fish

By | 2017-05-15T09:29:08+00:00 May 15th, 2017|inspire-ations|13 Comments

Do you get in your way of communicating?

Communication is one of those things that can be tough even when everyone is doing it well. But let's face it, some people do not do it so well. And tend not to notice it. i thought today maybe we can help them notice it. Warning though - there may be a moment when the person noticing it needs to be you... or me. There will be an invitation at the end to add your [...]

Ask first before you leap [to conclusions]

i attended a race panel last night called Real Talk where we got to hear stories from a black, coloured and white person [tbV]. It was a really great time and hopefully more churches and organisations will start hosting these moments of just getting to hear each other and catch glimpses into journeys that have been quite different from ours. One of the stories that Mbulelo shared was about the time he was on a plane [...]

Listen hear

i just had a brief conversation with a Facebook friend that began with him writing the words, "Knowing what white privilege is..." and then asking a question. Having learnt from some people who are really good at Questions over the last few years, i responded with one of my own: Well i would need to know what you understand when you say that you get what it means to have white privilege - how would [...]

Breaking Bread [with Trev]: Listening to the Listeners

i have been enjoying these conversations with Trevor Black from Swart Donkey. Back and forth five times on a topic with about 100 words a time. This is our third collaborative blog conversation, this time with a focus on Listening to the Listeners. i hope you will enjoy it. = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =  Trev: I loved the Free Speech board at my university residence. [...]

You can’t “Give them a Voice”!

The other day i was on the bus coming back from camp chatting to someone and they spoke a line that sends electricity through my body [and not in a good way]. i think we were talking about my blog and the other person said something about, 'Giving them a voice.' i can never ever give anyone else a voice.  i can recognise and acknowledge and make space for and step out of the way [...]

How to Craft a South African Kaleidoscope

i just read a really helpful piece by Brene Brown titled, 'Own our History. Change the story' which is focused on Americaland which has what feels like a completely different story, when it comes to present race issues, in many ways, but also some remarkably similar overlaps. Owning our stories is standing in our truth. It’s transformative in our personal and professional lives AND it’s also critical in our community lives. But we don’t think about history [...]

i'm not sure you're against that thing you think you're against [Intro]

Sometimes two sides of a vociferous argument can both be right. A silly [but true] example could be someone from Americaland arguing that mayonnaise is horrible [i have lived here for three years and am still to find one i find overly edible] Whereas, having tasted South African mayo, and especially the no name brand big jar version, i might argue that mayonnaise is incredible. We would both be telling the truth in terms of [...]

One way to love your spouse better – Richard Erasmus [listening better]

my friend, Rich Erasmus, has been married for seventeen years to his lovely wife Cindy, and has some nuggets of wisdom to share with us in the area of one way you can love your spouse better: 'I would say one of the most important ways that I have “learned to love my wife better”, is through a technique I was introduced to during an “Imago” course. Bottom line … I learned to listen to [...]

How to Save a Marriage… before you need to. [part viii]

great words of marriage wisdom from my good friend Debbie [who once taught me how to play 30 Seconds, for the second time] Realize that in the difficult stuff you are NOT against each other. Together, as a Team, face the issue. Don't put it in between you. LISTEN to each others NEEDS. Actively love, in words, in actions, in selflessness, in putting their needs above your own. Can I just throw in there that [...]

By | 2011-11-12T06:32:38+00:00 November 12th, 2011|love and chocolate, marriage, relationships|2 Comments